I wasn't terrified down 2-0 against Slovenia. Give me a team that doesn't have a chance...and is against all odds and I have confidence that we can come back and tie the game. We may lose later but we're tying the game. Give me a team that's supposed to win, a team favored to win...that's a team for which I am terrified. I am a BROWNS fan. I am used to losing. I expect the worst. "We control our own destiny." I don't want any part of that. That was the phrase after the Slovenia game. I was terrified. Without knowing a thing about Algeria other than a view I got 30 feet from the tv, intoxicated, during their match with England, I was petrified by their speed. I kept yelling at Noah the journalist, "I am afraid of their speed on the flanks." Prior to the match, we discovered that our backline would include Bornstein. Ohhh god...this is the start. We are screwed. God help us. We're losing this game. A goal early. Typical Browns. We finally get a shot at this god damn thing and we trot out a backline incapable of handling anything. I was a wreck.
In the back of the car, I attempted to alleviate some concern by playing some LCD Soundsystem. My ipod kept dying. A sign to be sure. If only Cribbs was here. We arrived at the game with too much time on our hands. We got sauced up a bit. Algerian fans poured in with drums and horns. We were outgunned in the back and in the drum department. Terrified.
I could go on. The game started. We couldn't put a goal in despite numerous opportunities. I was coming apart at the seams. Then, I recalled my training from earlier occasions. The Browns had a chance to clinch a playoff berth in Week 16 2007. Instead, they lost to a crappy Bengals team quarterbacked by Ryan Fitzgerald. Derek Anderson threw four interceptions. We somehow stayed in the game and I watched a pass flutter over Kellen Winslow in the end zone as time expired to lose. Josh Cribbs naturally returned a punt for a TD at the game I attended the next week. However, Tony Dungy played his subs in the Sunday night game and we lost at midnight Monday while I was in a busport in Pittsburgh to eliminate us from the playoffs as my dad texted me every 20 minutes as he'd promised he'd do. My heart was ripped out.
So there we were as Buddle missed Altidore cutting in the 90th minute Wednesday, I steeled myself for a 0-0 draw...maybe Slovenia tallies a goal vs. England. We can't seem to get a score anywhere. Andrew is panicked on his cell phone trying to get internet so we can find the score. Then, we broke out...I'd love to say I remember watching it all develop but it's all a blur. I saw us running down the field...I was standing...as a I recall with Geoff and Andrew. Arm in arm. Clint got a foot on it...the ball kicked out. Landon kicked it in. We lost it.
We lost it and lost it. and lost it. To give you a sense of how long we hugged, cried, exploded, high-fived, and waved flags, the next time I looked up, Slovenia had a corner. I was confused and disoriented. Naturally, I expected them to tie it. "BLOW THE GOD DAMNED WHISTLE!!!!!" Then, they did. And we were through. I lost my sunglasses while banging on the signage hanging from the second deck chanting USA. A young child picked up my sunglasses and put them on as he walked out of the stadium. We hugged more...we chanted, "We're on top of the group." It was amazing. I am one of the luckiest people alive at present. I am here in South Africa with some great friends watching the U.S. play, win, and succeed.
We'll be at Rustenburg on Saturday. I'll be just as concerned then with an emotionally devastating loss. But at least I got to experience an unparalleled emotionally exhilarating win.
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